Khamis, 20 Januari 2011

hidupku..


Assalamualaikum

susah nak diunggapkan dengan kata-kata.. lama betol atie tak menulis.. kenapa mngapa? em.. hati atie hilang, atie mahukan hati yang baru. hati ini sudah kurang fungsinya.. atie mahu disudut yang dalam.. ada DIA. tapi kini.. semakin hilang. iman pon turun naik... ermm.

2010 adalah tahun.. yang membawa seribu makna.. pada awalnya.. atie sendiri tak mengenali diri atie sapa.. hidup dalam kegelapan.. suka marah-marah. kalu berdoa selepas solat sekejap je tgan nie bole angkat pastu rasa malas.. sembahyang subuh tahap dinasor hijau.. tak tahu.. hati tu dah keras. terlampau keras, memang kurang sabar pada waktu ini, diri sendiri pon tak terjaga, terkejar-kejar cinta manusia.. ermm.. sudah!!!!!!!!!! sudah!!!!!!!!!!! tinggalkan kisah dahulu. tutup! sesiapa pon takleh buka balik.. kalau atie buat balik semua2, atie nak tampar muka atie laju2..

saat akhir2 tahun 2010, hati atie ditarik-tarik, carilah cinta sebenar, merayu pada diri. bangkitlah syg! bangkit! atie dah tak de tempat meluahkan perasaan, hanya ALLAH je yg mampu dgr luahan. Allah syg sgat umatnya.. biarpon kita nie selalu lupa.. kita khayal, kita asyik!! nauzubillah... Allah sentiasa peluk atie.. penah satu ketika tu atie pinta ya Allah peluk lah atie peluklah.. waktu solat subuh, ade sesuatu yg terjadi kat atie.. kwan baik atie finie kal, siap kuar gambar lagi, atie pon angkatlah.. dia bg ceramah pg kat atie dia kata, atie!! atie.. dia nangis2 kata.. atie finie terlewat bangun subuh.. atie tgoklah jam.. aipp, baru kul 6 suku.. huhuhu. jahilnya.. ermm.. dia kata kat atie.. Allah amat2 berkira soal bgun awal.. atie pon dgr la dia ckap. pastu, atie g solat. then, tgok2 kat receive call, tak de nama finie!!!!!!!! masyaALLAH. sape kal atie takdi!! sapa2??? sapa!!! menangis atie masa tu jugak. kal kwan atie, ade kal tak. tak da~~ ya ALLAH, kau mnjaga solatku.. Allah syg atie. tapi atie. pliz.. atie.. hidup nie tak tahu bila mati.

terlalu byak2 dugaan.. atie ada masalah dgr minor atie. erm. kalau kat upsi nie. minor means, subjek yg backup yg kita kena ajar kat skola.. atie ambik minor kimia.. atie study sungguh. sebab kepala otak atie dah hilang lebih kurang 80% about kimia.. sebab dah tinggal setahun setagah tak tahu lah.. masuk kelas je blur2.. atie dapat carrymark teruk!! teruk giler... mcm apa tah. atie merayu kat lec nak wat repeat kuiz.. atas alasan tertentu. lec bg.. Alhamdulillah naik la skit.. em. atie balik lambat for raya haji. akaun fb atie pon ditutup.. sebab nak consentrasi yg baik.. atie habiskan mmbaca semua. tapi malam sebelum exam. atie tak leh lelap lansung mata. atie nangis.. minta Allah bg peluang tuk atie tido..atie doa byak, doa kat RasulAllah.. tolong atie.. tolonglah atie nak tido! erm. dlm kul 4 stgah bru dpat tido. pg esok. sakit sagat2 kepala. atie tak tahu dah.. soalan tanya apa.. atie hanya mampu mnjawab 2 soalan objektif lam masa stgah jam. tu pon hentam.. pening!! sedih sgat. hati atie waktu tu dah berkecai..

redha dgn ketentuanNYA.. atie hilang semangat.. menangis je pas exam tu. sebaik esok just ada 1 exam 20 %. em.. kwan baik atie tlg, aja satu2.. atie just bole dgar. baca pon dah takleh masuk..... erm.. hati atie dah kusut.kusut2. doa je. doa2 doa2.. pastu atie mohon perlu tak atie tukar minor. erm. jumpa org nie, org nie. org nie..penat. turun naik pejabat akademik, g falcuty, g ketua jabatan, g penasihat akademik.. semua suh tukar. waktu tu atie dah fikir atie failed.. atie tak nak, nanti last minute baru atie terhegeh-hengeh nak tukar. t kena extend sem.. emm.. tapi atie tak tahu atie nak tukar subjek apa.. atie ada pilihan waktu tu kh..sivik, moral. waktu 2 memang rasa kerdil sagat atie sgai hambaNYA. erm.. atie pergi cari ketua jabatan kh, moral, sivik.. diorg tak cuti, tapi diorg tak da!!!! ALLAH tak takdirkan atie berjumpa dgn mereka. kenapa!!!! ermm. ade hikmah.. ade hikmah.. then, esok atie bgun pg, atie jerit.. erm.. aqi minor ape eh??? aqi keushawanan.. huhuhu.. yeah! atie kena cuba keushawanan.. pergi ketua jabatan.. dia ADA. minta nasihat. dia terus bg sokngan, yg atie boleh bwak subjek tu.. huhuhu.. ^^. Alhamdulillah, Allah maha besar. ALLAHUAKBAR!!!!!!

ade 4 steps nak tukar mnor. jumpa ketua jabatan minor asal, dekan minor asal, ketua jabatan minor baru, dekan minor baru. if tak lepas satu steps, takleh g steps seterusnya.. wa.. beberapa je tinggal.. pastu atie mahu g kat sesuatu tempat..tempat tuk cari ketenangan.. dan tinggalkan zaman lampau..atie ingat ari isnin akan bertolak rupanya kesokkan nya.. waaaaaaaa.. sedeynya.. sedey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! atie jumpa ketua jabatan then dia tak da. dr pg smpai ke petang, last2 cari nom fone dia kat board, ckap nak wat appointment. then dia kata kul 4.30 ptg.. dh kul 5 suku dia tak de jugak. atie pon tulis la surat merasakan rasa hati.. ermm.. sadis sgat masa tu. pastu letak bawah pintu.. atie kata, atie akan dtg lagi selepas 2 minggu.. pastu.. bila smpai rumah, ketua jabatan kal atie. dia kata dah approve!! ya ALLAH.. gembira smpai terduduk. dan dia dah bg surat atie kat dekan.. ya ALLAH terima kasih.. ^^. atie dlm 2 minggu di sana. hanya ALLAH je tahu, sebab atie terpikir adakah dekan approve, adakah result atie betol2 failed!! ermm.. masalah dunia.. tapi atie berani hadapi semua tu. sebab ALLAH dah bg kekuatan dlm hati nie. terima kasih ALLAH.

lepas 2 minggu atie coming back, atie tak tahu nak berteduh kat mana. tepon org nie, tepon org nie.. ermm. semua tak memahami.. huhu. last2 ade jugak Allah bg rezeki.. duduk lah sekejap2, sebab tu rumah office, petang2 ade org rehat.. bersyukurlah.. tapi sekali pergi kampus rm5, kalu pergi balik rm10. pengangkutan ada 2 jam kot sekali. duit mmg dah tak da. atie makan jela mana yang mampu. atie bukan nak sgat duk lama2 kat khar, tapi sebab.. ada hal. ermm.. Allah itu ada. takpe2..

erm, dekan lulus.. tinggal dua steps. result atie pon Alhamdulillah semua lulus.. syukur sgat2.. ^^. Allah maha besar. tapi atie rasa lecture tolong bg lulus je kot. kalu tak tak lulus.. (T.T) erm, step ketiga ketua jabatan yg baru nie tak de. dia just ada bukak cuti. atie pon terus beli tiket.. then, bali.. biarpon tak lama.. kamis balik semula ahad.. ^^. rindu sgat kat family. rindu..kat adik.

2011, tahun yg baru..maslaah belum lg selesai.. rasa2 lam 12 aribulan kot, barulah beres segalanya... kwan2 atie yg ambik minor kimia pon ikot jejak langkah.. wah, huhuhu.. terasa berat dihatii.. diorg jgn tukar jika tak mahu.. tapi waktu tu, atie jd emosional sebab atie dah berhempas pulas tak balik, ermm... then, diorg nak tukar ada pulak atie nak kena ikot. atie mendengar hasutan yg tak baik.. nauzubillah.. atie wat keje waktu tu.. mcm lam keadaan terpaksa.. atie nie.. sedey tau..

sekarang atie dan kwan2 yg buat perubahan klimaks, terus berjuang.. dgn mngajak adik2 yg lain mgenai ISLAM.. atie dh jd, naqibah.. ^^. Alhamdulillah.. tapi.. atie pulak yg ada masalah hati. erm.. atie perlu bersihkan hati nie.. sebab ada masalah sedikit. perlu2.. tolong atie. dampingi atie dgn kata2 nasihat.. kenapa atie masih susah nak bangun solat taubat.. tolong!!!!!!! ermm.. saya mahukan hati saya hanya terpaut dgn kasih MU ya ALLAH..


imetable for Semester : A102 - Semester 2 Sesi 2010/2011

Lecture and Tutorial Session

Slot/Day
MONTUEWEDTHUFRISATSUN
08:00-09:00
PPM3013
Grp: B (Lect)
ANJUNG 2
PPM3013
Grp: B (Lect)
DKI



CSP2021
Grp: A (Lect)
G. Bola Jaring

09:00-10:00

PPM3013
Grp: B (Lect)
DKI



CSP2021
Grp: A (Lect)
G. Bola Jaring

10:00-11:00



KBP3043
Grp: A (Lect)
DKJ



11:00-12:00



KBP3043
Grp: A (Lect)
DKJ
PPI3133
Grp: B (Lect)
TS 4A


12:00-13:00
KBL3033
Grp: A (Lect)
DKA


KBP3043
Grp: A (Lect)
DKJ



13:00-14:00







14:00-15:00
PPI3133
Grp: B (Lect)
TS 8A
KPS3014
Grp: S (Lect)
DKA





15:00-16:00
PPI3133
Grp: B (Lect)
TS 8A
KPS3014
Grp: S (Lect)
DKA


PAF3023
Grp: C (Lect)
TS 7A


16:00-17:00



KPS3014
Grp: S (Lect)
DKA
PAF3023
Grp: C (Lect)
TS 7A


17:00-18:00
FIK3042
Grp: AF (Lect)
KM1


KPS3014
Grp: S (Lect)
DKA



18:00-19:00
FIK3042
Grp: AF (Lect)
KM1
PAF3023
Grp: C (Lect)
TS 7A





19:00-20:00







20:00-21:00

KBL3033
Grp: A (Lect)
DKH





21:00-22:00

KBL3033
Grp: A (Lect)
DKH





22:00-23:00







23:00-24:00









KBL3033- PRINSIP DAN STRATEGI PENGAJARAN KANAK-KANAK BERMASALAH PENGLIHATAN
CSP2021- BOLA JARING
KBP3043- KURIKULUM DAN PENAKSIRAN MURID BERMASALAH PEMBELAJARAN
FIK3042- ENGLISH FOR COMMUNICATION II
KPS3014- PENGURUSAN PEMBELAJARAN
PPI3133- TEORI KEUSAHAWANAN
PAF3023- PERAKAUNAN AWALAN
PPM3013- PENGANTAR PEMASARAN

atie ambik 22 kredit sem, nie.. ganti minor sem lepas yg atie sudah ketinggalan.. chaiyok!!!!
doakan atie dipermudahkan segala urusan.. YA ALLAH, jauhilah aku dr perkara yg mungkar. YA ALLAH tetapkan hatiku dijalanMU. aku pohon...

wassalam.. cintalah ISLAM lebih dr nyawamu sendiri.


sentiasa takut dengan umur yg semakin pendek.

14 comments:

♥ HeRWaNa HeRMan ♥ berkata...

salam...
bnyk2 bersabar dik..
bila Allah pilih kita terima ujian maknanya Allah sayang kita..

mgkn time tu kita jauh dgn Allah..

Allah letakkan ujian dunia agar kita kembali pd jalan sebenar..

Letak kebergantungan yg tinggi pd Allah...

semua dtg dr Allah..

Cari sahbt yg boleh membantu..

cari tempat yg memberi ketenangan..

insyaAllah yg terbaik...

wallahualam

Kakzakie Purvit berkata...

Salam....

Dalam apa jua hal setelah kita berusaha beroda kepadaNya. Usah takut kerana sesunguhnya Allah maha pengasih dan penyayang.

Insya-Allah ada kejayaan dipengakhirannya....

di sebalik wajahku.. berkata...

terima kasih semua.. doakan saya sentiasa berada di jalan kebenaran.

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